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PROJECTIONS AND A CURE

Two wonderful ways to quickly recognize and control bothersome emotional reactions.

1.  Projections---it’s you!  Yes, yes, hard to believe.

2.  Stop!  Look!  Listen!---the 15-second cure

 

1

PROJECTIONS

It’s you!  Yes, yes, hard to believe.

If you are reasonably honest and courageous, the next time someone does something that irritates you.

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STOP!

Do you do the same?

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Yes, he is putting you down---did you put him down?  Ok, ok, so she’s not listening to you---were you listening to her?  Yeah for sure, she’s such a know-it-all---maybe best take a quick look in the mirror.

     They are probably doing what bothers you, but you overreact because you do the same but not about to admit it.

Children also trigger projections.

 

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Carl Jung

If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves.

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There is a big payoff owning your projections.  You see others and yourself much more accurately.  You can then make important, beneficial changes in how you react to others and to yourself.  To learn more about a projection, put it in Fritz’ Magic Chair and go to it.

     I hate to tell you this, but if you are surrounded by boring people---it's you.  Liven up and you will attract lively people.

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WHAT DID YOU FIND?

 

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2

STOP!  LOOK!  LISTEN!

The 15-second cure

A quick, effective way to reduce and get rid of unneeded reactions like anxiety, fear, anger, etc---triggered by particular situations.  Maybe you’re bothered by walking into a room of strangers, or feeling put down.

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The next time that happens.

STOP!

Do nothing for 15 seconds except Look and Listen.

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Probably nobody is staring as you walk into the room but if someone is, give them a nice, big smile.

Maybe he is putting you down, or maybe you’re letting experiences from the past determine your reaction.  If the first, find better friends.  If the second, you’ve made a valuable return to Reality.

     The 15-Second Cure can be used to reduce any reaction you don’t need or want.  Stopping your usual response for a few seconds gives you a chance to fact check the validity of the expectations triggering your reaction.  And it distracts your mind—reducing the strength of the association between the situation and your automatic response.

     A nice combination of a positive message and Pavlov’s deconditioning.

 

WHAT DID YOU FIND?

 

 

 

 

 

Jennifer

The first time I tried this I couldn’t do it.  The fear, anxiety or whatever it is overwhelmed my good intentions.  I just knew that people were staring, I didn‘t have to look.  I was better prepared the second time, I touched my hand, and stopped and looked.  Nobody.  Nobody.  Yes a few glanced up and a couple smiled, but nobody was staring.  I changed into the wild one and waved and more people smiled.  All that time and pain wasted?  I can’t believe it.

     The next time it didn’t work so well.  A guy really was staring at me.  I dropped my eyes in embarrassment as usual.  And then felt terrible.  Why?  Why am I embarrassed?

     A couple tries later I caught another guy staring.  This time I was ready.  My Wild Woman stared back.  And he looked the other way in embarrassment.  I smiled and waved and he was ok.

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